How a chimp goes mattress hunting

By Sarah Zielinski, 16:38 PM April 17, 2014

Note: The following scene is fiction (probably). Stay tuned for the real story below.

Two chimps, a mother and daughter, are touring a mattress store. They’re looking for beds to sleep in for the night. Actually, they’re looking for materials to make their beds — or nests, as they’re properly called. This is something chimps do every night for their entire lives after they’re weaned.

“What characteristics are you looking for in your bed?” asks the salesman. “Firm? Soft? Perhaps something that ...

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